THAT triangular portion
of the great Mojave desert lying south of the curve of the Sierra Nevadas,
where those mountains unite with the coast hills is known as Antelope Valley. A
big, barren, windy country, rising from the level of the desert in long,
undulating slopes that face abruptly toward the mountains.
In the open placers
rise weird phalanxes of yucca palms, and among the hills little dark pools hide
their treacherous margins in unwholesome grasses, and the white leprous crest
of alkali. A country to be avoided by the solitary traveler, with its hard,
inhospitable soil, and its vast monotony of contour and color. A country
sublime in its immensity of light, and soft unvarying tints,--fawn, and olive,
and pearl, with glistening stretches of white sand, and brown hollows between
the hills, out of which the gray and purple shadows creep at night. A country
laid visibly under the ban of eternal silence.
Crossing the valley,
and forming the third side of the triangle, runs the long road that leads from
San Diego and the south to the open country along the Sacramento and the San
Joaquin. Coming over the rise of the hill where this road turns away from
Elizabeth Lake, rode in the early October morning a little train of horsemen, followed
by half a dozen nondescript vehicles from which the faces of women and children
peered through a confusion of household goods.
They were of the class
commonly styled "Greasers," a mixed origin plainly visible in the
dark hue of the skin, the crisp, coarse hair, the high-arched foot and the
Madonna-like outlines of the women's heads. The dust of travel lay thick on the
wide sombreros of the men and in the creases of their heavy saddles. The horses
and women showed the fatigue of a long journey. Still they went forward
briskly. There was the vigor of youth in the clear air. The grease of the
breakfast shone on the children's faces. There was much animated conversation
among the men and gay sallies from the young women; but whenever unusual
laughter was provoked it was checked by sighs and shrugs of commiseration, and
the women glanced sympathetically at the last wagon in the train.
It was driven by a
woman, whose form betrayed the shapeless middle-age common to her class. The
strong patience of the hills was in her eyes and mouth. Whenever a smooth bit
of road permitted her to take her eyes from the horses she looked back into the
wagon, where on a rude bed, under an improvised covering of calico bed-quilts,
lay a young man in the delirium of fever. He had been ailing for some time, and
three days ago the fever seized him with an intermittent force that sapped his
strength visibly, like the shaking of an hour-glass.
The mother had urged
the expedition forward with all possible speed. They were still many days
distant from a physician to make him well, or a priest if he should die.
"Mother of God! if he should die!" A sudden spasm of anxiety
contracted her oval, unwrinkled face into the semblance of shrunken old age.
Had she not daily prayed to the Virgin that he might live to comfort her, now
that his father was dead. Ave Santisima! He was her only son. For what sin
would the good God punish her?
There was the heavy
gold bracelet the Ingles had given her,--and Felipe's father had been so angry.
She, she had been a vain, foolish thing, but, Santa Maria, what can you expect
when one is young? The bracelet had been given to the priest, and she and her
husband had been very happy together. Mother of Christ! how proud he had been
when Felipe was born! That was because she had prayed to the Virgin for a son.
She had burned a wax candle before the Virgin for each month of her pregnancy,
and they had burned quite clear and evenly down to the end; not one had
flickered or gone out. Ave Maria!--and Felipe was such a son,--there was never
another like him. Now if he would get well, she would give the Virgin the gold
beads her husband had bought her. True, she had intended the beads for Felipe's
wife,--but if he should die, what then? Ay, Jesu Christi! He must not die.
At noon the travelers
halted before a brackish spring that oozed stealthily out of the hillside. The
horses drank thirstily of the warm, turbid stream that flowed across the road;
the men shook their damp, crisp hair, pressed close to the head in a shining
crease where the heavy sombrero rested. The women gathered sympathetically
around the mother of Felipe, chattering together in their soft dialect, with
little nods and shrugs, and pious ejaculations in quick, bird like accents. For
only one of these the mother drew back the calico curtain; this was Benita,
Felipe's betrothed. The girl rested one round arm on the rim of the wheel, and
laid her hand on the young man's forehead. She leaned forward lazily; her dress
fell away untidily from her brown throat, revealing the beauty of the warm,
young curves within. She remained silently stroking her lover's forehead, while
the elder women questioned and suggested volubly.
The halt at noon was
short; the expedition hoped to cross the mountains before night, and the ascent
was long and difficult.
A dry, warm wind was
blowing; the horses strained in their collars, the sick man tossed and moaned
continually.
The hills were higher
and more desolate, and seemed endowed with some infernal mechanism, shutting in
silently behind, and opening out noiselessly before, giving up the road
grudgingly, as if the very secret of the earth went with it.
There is always a wind
at the summit of the hills. There is full daylight there, too, until the night
falls suddenly. It is as if the wind blew against the shadows that would have
crept up from the valley, beating them back and back from the high places until
night falls.
There is hope, too, at
the summit of the hill. Who has not drawn it in with deep breaths of the
scentless wind? Felipe forgot his delirious dreams, turned easily on his side
and slept, and Benita and the mother comforted each other.
The two women rode down
the grade together. Antonio Lesalda, Benita's father, walked beside the wagon,
saying, "It is a good country that we come to. There is much food there
for the horses, and wood, and a good spring that I know of, coming out of the
rocks at the foot of the last grade. It will be better for Felipe if we rest
there three days. Besides the hunting is good. My father and Mateo Gonzales
killed three bears there in one week. It will not be long now, but it is soon
dark in the caņon."
The women spoke to each
other seldom. It was inexplicable to Benita that her lover should be ill. Luis
and Pablo had not so much strength in their whole bodies as was in Felipe's
right arm, and she could hear them laughing now with that Gonzales girl. Felipe
could not be very sick. How soundly he slept. Her father was right,--they would
rest for three days, and the men would get him fresh meat to eat, and he would
be strong again. "Now, what are they laughing at there, I wonder!"
The elder woman glanced
furtively at the girl's face between her mumbled prayers.
"She is so young,
how will she bear it if he should die?" she thought. "Jesu! What am I
saying! If he sleeps, all will be well, and I will live with them,--but the
Virgin shall have the gold beads."
At the foot of the
mountains the men came to unharness the horses. This they did quietly, for the
mother had fallen on her knees, rosary in hand. She could not do this before.
It took both her hands to drive. The horses wallowed in the rank grass, the
children ran about to gather sticks for the fire. "See that you go not too
far, or the bears will get you," cried Antonio teasingly. The women busied
themselves about the supper. Benita sat beside Felipe and held his hand. He had
recognized her, and she felt now more than ever that she loved him. She began
to be touched by the fierce anxiety the mother displayed in every tone and
movement.
When all had been made
safe for the night, the mother of Felipe went a little apart from the camp to
pray. After the children were asleep the other women joined her, each for a
little while,--moving sidewise while they prayed, to rest their knees from the
hard stones.
There was no motion in
the hills and the moon was shining. The click of the rosary sounded as loud to
her as the "shriek, shriek" of the night birds. The mother mumbled
on,--"The Virgin will surely hear me,--she also is a mother,--he is my
only son,--and I will burn my candles."
"Come," said
Benita, "you must sleep. See how wet the grass is."
In the morning Felipe
was dead.
The travelers had
camped in a broad, sandy basin, strewn with bowlders, cut across with deep
irregular gullies, now concealed by a coarse rank growth of weeds and
grass,--the dry bed of a mountain torrent.
The mother would not
consent that Felipe should be buried here. "How shall I find my son if he
be buried here?" she thought.
"It is well,"
said Antonio to the men. "It is hard to dig here, we will go on."
When they had come to a
little rise of ground overlooking Lastac Lake, Antonio drew rein. "Shall
it not be here?"
The woman shook her
head.
Again in a little
while,--"Shall it not be here?"
"Not yet. Not
yet."
They were now well into
the Caņon de Los Vinos. Great oaks lined the water-courses, and climbed half
way up the hills. There were still green places by the springs, and running
water. The cavalcade drew out from the roadside. "It must be here, Seņora,"
said Antonio authoritatively.
The women sobbed
vehemently, Benita loudest of all. The mother did not weep. She seemed suddenly
to have fallen into that inscrutable old age that overtakes women of her race.
She could look no older, and appeared never to have been young.
When it was over, some
one cut Felipe's name on the oak under which they buried him.
At high noon the
diminished party of wanderers passed slowly and with effort over the barrier
that rears itself across the caņon's mouth like the outer rim of the world,
dropping down into the vast, dim valley of the San Joaquin, hazy with the mists
of its marshes, and the floating phantoms of mirage where the quivering light
strikes back from the long vistas of its unsheltered sands.
AFTER ten years the
mother of Felipe no longer mourned openly for her son, but her face had
forgotten any other expression than the look of inscrutable old age she had carried
away from his grave. It had become as fixed as the contour of the hills or as
the purpose in her heart.
Mass had been said for
her son's soul; his body must not always lie in unblessed ground. After ten
years God gave her an opportunity. Her brother's son and one of the men that
had buried Felipe had affairs that took them within a few hours' journey of the
Caņon de Los Vinos. It is not in the hearts of these people to deny a
consolation to old age. They had little faith in the success of her undertaking:
many trees had been cut down, the old wagon trail was obliterated, and the
present stage road had been made on the other side of the caņon.
The mother felt no
uncertainty. She had marked the place too well for that. A feverish excitement
stirred her dull pulses. Yonder, under that blazed oak Felipe was lying,--his
face was turned a little to one side,--the cross was on his breast.
Antonio had marked out
the grave by the shadow of the straight, thick trunk, three paces from the foot
of the tree. The men stepped off the distance, and began to dig. Presently they
perceived that they had made a mistake. Felipe had been buried in the early
morning, and it was now noon. They selected a new place more carefully, and
began again.
Conversation flagged
when they were knee deep; at waist deep, perspiration broke out suddenly. They
threw down their shovels, and began to poke in the loosened earth with sticks,
never with their hands.
First there was a
collar bone, then an arm and a hand. The men threw the bones out upon the
grass, shaking their hands free of the earth that clung to them. The mother of
Felipe gathered the bones into her apron, stooping painfully. Age overcame her
power of quick motion; moreover she was fat. Tears ran from her sunken eyes,
and hung in the creases of her withered cheeks. Patches of damp mould clung to
the unwholesome relics; these she wiped off upon the grass and on her dress.
The diggers finished
their task quickly. She sat down upon the grass hugging the ghastly bundle to
her breast, unwilling to allow it to be placed in the box prepared for it. She
took up handfuls of the discolored earth and wept over it.
This purpose
accomplished she had one other desire. She wished to see Benita. Antonio
Lesalda, in pursuance with his nomadic instincts, had drifted back from the
north into these very mountains and made his home in one of those innumerable
triangular openings between the hills. This much she knew from floating bits of
information that had reached her. She knew also that his wife was dead, and
that Benita was still with him. The heart of the mother was very tender toward
the woman who also mourned for her son. "We will not forget Felipe,"
the two women had sobbingly protested to each other at parting.
They found Lesalda's
place with little difficulty, and Benita was very glad to see them. She put
down her baby that she might discharge the duties of hospitality. When the
youngster rolled over on the floor and cried she put both hands under his arms
and dragged him into a sitting posture, chattering with short-breathed
volubility.
"Did she not know
she was married? Yes,--for five years, and she had three children. Her husband
was in Los Angeles with the horses. Such a good man and so handsome,--but they
would see; he would surely be home in a day or two. What? They must go on
tonight!"
Benita was genuinely
sorry for this; visitors were rare with her. The old woman had made her
decision suddenly. The mother of her son would not stay in a house that had
forgotten him. She had never contemplated the possibility of Benita's marriage;
the fact came to her with all the shock of a flagrant desertion. She was almost
dumb under the fire of Benita's good-natured questioning.
Now, what had she come
for? For Felipe? "Ah! poor Felipe! But you should have stayed with me, and
my father would have gone with the men. It is not for women to be digging in
the graves of the dead."
An hour later the
mother of Felipe, looking back from the last curve of the winding road, saw
Benita balancing the baby with her fat hands while the bare, brown legs wavered
through the intricacies of three short paces.
The treasured box of
grisly relics had not been disturbed. Only in the hearts of mothers lives
unconsolable regret.
Mary Austin.